I have caught myself many times, constantly mimicking scenes from the world I make up in my head. It goes like this. I walk about a few steps down a narrow path towards you. The sight of you gives me butterflies and I just light up. Suddenly my face feels hot. Blood rushes from the inner core of my body to the veins on the tips of my fingers and all the way down my legs. My adrenaline.
I have caught myself in a self play of words between me and you. It's what I do when we are apart. I feel you close. That's all I would ever want to feel.
I have caught myself a liar for all the times I told myself I can live without you. I can't. You have a grip on me. Don't let me go. I'm staying.
I have caught myself closing my eyes and hearing your distant laugh that seems so familiar close by. I close my eyes each night whispering silent prayers and tracing the way your face looks until I fall in an endless epiphany of lucid dreams.
Home is what I make of this and home to me is you.
I suddenly have that emotional pang of writing everything down as fast as i can before i forget.Its like adrenaline. The hot fuzzy feeling lifting me from within.
I somehow feel that human beings like ourselves should push ourselves out there.
To achieve what we really want and to be whom we truly are.
Life is too short isnt it? To just sit around and mope. To complain about things that make us tick and to find the odd things that relate to us the most.
Find out what makes you want to wake up in the morning and be the best at what you want to be. Its not easy, I know but its not impossible either.
Do the things that you fear the most and you will feel yourself unravel into a person you never thought you could be.
Be bold and daring enough to take that plunge. Nothing great will ever be achieved in your personal comfort zone.
Nothing great was ever achieved without trying.
This world is encompassed by human beings,
Who see defeat as weakness,
And mistakes as something they never commit.
This world has become a harsh and violent battlefield,
Where pride and money become toys for addicts.
This world has become nothing more than a barren land,
Of dirt waiting to be filled with dead corpses.
This world will only be an object for those,
To chant wars and wait for armed responses.
This world deserves more,
Than your useless mouth and tattered acts of throwing rocks.
Over the years I have watched myself grow into the person I am today. I'm sure all of us are proud to have come this far too.
It has always occurred to me to ask myself who am I and what am I of good use to this world. Growing up as a teenager, I always wanted to fit into a group of people. I wanted to be a part of them as much as I wanted them to accept me. It was hard. I found myself doing things to please others. I became a puppet in my own world. I was controlled by what society wanted me to be.
I believe making mistakes are essential for you to re-evaluate your life. It makes you know what you want and it makes you understand yourself better. I decided I didn't want to be a puppet anymore. I wanted to empower myself for the great things I set out to be and that's what I did.
I withdrew myself from the people who claimed to be my friends. It was a good move. I withdrew myself from the world I made up in my immature head and became a new person. I slowly found myself by doing new things and engaging myself with other groups of people. I started to open my mind to embrace differences. I started embracing myself for being me.
Sometimes I wonder if other people have felt what I have felt? I'm sure we have been through this similar phase. I also know that sometimes there is a point in your life where you get so tired of pleasing others and you drop everything and change. Change for the better of course.
We need to live in a place where differences are accepted and embraced. If not accepted at least respected.