When I was young I remember constantly trying to be the best I could. When my Dad asked if I was tired or if I needed rest, I always said no. I didn’t want him to feel like I gave up. Even if its nothing like that at all. I guess its how I was raised, to shun out any negative word that might drown me of my own capability.
At the age of nine I started getting serious on sports. I attended Badminton coaching and intense training. I became good at Badminton, but I always thought I was never good enough. I represented my school and it was a good experience of winning and losing. Oh, after starting Badminton I stopped playing the organ at Grade 6 and took up Taekwondo till I got my blue belt and eventually stopped too due to priorities on academics. It was hard to set my mind to focus completely on a single thing and to let the whole universe conspire to help me achieve it. I was afraid I couldn’t be good at other things.
In the midst of my Badminton training etc. I became a runner too. Long distance was my thing. It always has. Again, I felt I was good but not good enough. I remember training side by side beside my Dad late in the evening and timing myself. I remember the tracks and the paths i took to test my endurance. I believed I wanted to be Daddy’s Girl. To run just like he did during his younger days.
I have driven and shaped myself so much to this day that I am constantly on the move. Honestly, I believe taking naps are a waste of time, I believe that rest is something that only people who are super exhausted deserve. I believe I don’t deserve rest. I am in a constant loophole of trying to figure out all the possible things that I can and should be doing to improve myself. I want to grow and I don't want to stop.
Today I realise why I always thought I was never good enough for Badminton, playing the organ, Taekwondo or Running. Its because I believe, I and we are all talented enough to master many things instead of just one. Honestly I still don't know what I'm really good at and I'm still discovering myself. Experience matters the most doesn't it?
"You can be good at one thing and one thing only,
but you can also be good at many things" 🙂